Monday, December 20, 2010

Saturday morning I woke to read the scale saying 206.3, and I was bewildered, since for dinner Friday night I at two pieces or pork chop. Yes, the first had been shared with a three year old but still, it was breaded meat. But there it was. I had a late breakfast/early lunch on Saturday, going out to Mimi's and having some southwestern burrito with many eggs, some cheese, cilantro, and beans. It was not easy to eat for being a jumbo-sized thing, but really, overall, healthy. I haven't looked it up but I know it's a lot better than some of the things I could've had for a meal. My bf, his stepson, the bf's mother and I all went to a winter party at a friends house that evening, wherein one brought a wrapped ornament, and food for the potluck. Being my mother's daughter, I made something, and in quantities so that there would be leftovers. I brought something I consider healthy, zucchini pancakes [or latkes as my father prefers them called]. They went over well, and by the time we made it to the party I was still full from lunch, and the three pancakes I had taste tested for flavor and consistency. I tried a sausage pesto manicotti which made me want to throw away my ideas of healthy living, and what I believe was a turkey casserole. I mingled, I twitched among this extended family of mine, and went to hide in the kitchen. The kitchen was the downfall.
I haven't been drinking, in this weight loss endeavor, but I was offered a glass of port. It was tasty tasty port, and between that and a sweet wine, I became comfortable. This would've been fine, but when the port was gone, my comfortable self reasoned I should move on to brandy, a cousin [my mind said] of port. I failed to heed my warning signs that it was time to lay off and switch to something more innocent, like water. When I drink, I get the munchies. For savory things. Not salty, just savory in general. Sadly, most of the dinner foods had been relocated for desert foods, and I heaped myself a plate-mostly-full or things I knew I shouldn't eat, but weren't sugary. A terrible mac n cheese [the cold had gotten to it], one more manicotti, and scoops of what turned out to be instant mashed potatoes, with who I don't agree. We don't speak. We nod politely in company,but that is all.
A bit later I discovered the onion dip and chips. I mostly wanted the onion dip, and would've gladly tried as the bf's mother had done and added to some turkey instead, but it was put away. Instead I ate it continuously while talking about serious and random matters with my friends.

On the way home I remembered why I don't mix mass quantities of alcohol with my mood stabilizers, and worried about dying as only an inebriated person can.
This morning, I was too afraid to check the scale.
Tomorrow will be soon enough to get back up on that particular surly horse. My stomach today tamed the horse of practical food consumption.

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